This is me: Amber Anderson

In 2013, I walked away from a tech career and into a whole new world — motherhood.

My boss thought I was crazy. A wash-up. A statistic. “Just a stay-at-home mom” is the exact phrase he used to describe me. My co-workers saw it as an opportunity — less competition. Some friends and family saw my decision as career suicide.

I had given my everything to my job. I worked long nights. I skipped important events. I put up with a lot of bullshit trying to follow Sheryl Sandberg’s advice to “lean in,” and chasing Ann-Marie Slaughter’s dream of “having it all.”

Then one day, it was over. My water broke and the world forced me to choose.

I chose my son.

I chose to breastfeed. I chose to bypass daycare. I chose story time. I chose to cuddle.

I chose motherhood.

Some people view motherhood as off the beaten path —the path that leads straight to a dead end. But for me, motherhood was just the beginning.

Never in my life have I felt more committed, focused and driven to build a better world than the day my son arrived. Early on, I learned that if I wanted better, I’d have to create it. So in 2016, I committed to doing better.

I focused on building up my agency and renamed it after my son so I’d never forget why I started it. Then I started eliminating the people in my life who took more than they gave.

I revisited my business relationships. I took a look at my partners and clients to determine which ones aligned with my values. I observed how they treated people and examined the work they were doing. I let go of the relationships that did not align.

I noticed there aren’t enough spaces for working parents, so I created MORE and started building them. Since our launch, MORE was featured in nearly 50 publications including some big ones like American Express, Forbes and Inc.—reconfirming that I am not the only one who craves MORE.

And last year, I decided it was time to go all in by sharing my story, honestly and authentically. It was also time for a big shift: one that included making a conscious effort to solely work with companies committed to doing better for women, just like me, by refocusing my agency and naming it Tote + Pears.

At Tote + Pears, we help well-intentioned businesses market meaningful products and services that address women’s needs throughout their life journey. We give employers a different outlook on the demands and desires of their female employees in order to support them better. And we help tech companies, overwhelming filled with men, build things that matter by keeping the women who buy their products at the forefront.

Tote + Pears is my response to the people who thought motherhood was the end for me. A sharp reminder of what can be lost when you view things from a narrow perspective. And the answer for those who want to do better.

---